Impenetrable mysteries of the Gyllenverse, part I

Jake Gyllenhaal looks gorgeous while bikingA few days ago, some new-but-old photos of Jake out biking were posted by the diligent and invaluable Stephanie at IHJ. As usual, the man looks outrageously attractive while exercising. There should be a law against this. Where's the sweat, Gyllenhaal? Anyway, these pics reminded me of something I've noticed before.

We all saw Jake's naked head in Jarhead. His skull is perfectly shaped, if somewhat large. Why is it, then, that every time we see him in a bike helmet, the thing is tilted ever so slightly to his right (our left)?

Jake's helmet, tilting slightly to his rightIt's not so much the fact that it's not straight that niggles at me; that seems reasonable enough. But it's always to his right side. Think I'm exaggerating? Take a look at some evidence. I am so not kidding here. Since I have nothing better to do, I've developed a few theories to explain this consistency.

  1. It's intentional. Jake likes to be a little goofy.
  2. He put it on that way because he really can't tell where the top of his head is without looking in a mirror.
  3. He makes a lot of steep right turns every time he rides, and centrifugal force pulls the helmet off-kilter.

I may never know the truth behind this phenomenon, but the important thing is that I recognize it exists and appreciate it as a part of the endless quirkiness that makes me a Gyllenhaalic. Jake: the man, the enigma, the goofball.

All photos: IHJ.


Xenia said...

Finally some serious matter to dissert about!

Speaking of Jake's bike helmet I have a theory of my own if you don't mind, my dear Cherita.

I think that it is a fashion issue.
Jake wears his helmet like a French painter wears his beret: on his right/left side.
BTW absolutely not straight.

cherita said...

You know, that explanation had occurred to me, Xenia. We know our boy has a tremendous style range, from his It's laundry day faded shirts and shorts to his Armani? pffft! red carpet glamour. This could indeed be another manner of injecting fashion into his routine. As if those spandex and lycra bike outfits weren't enough!